Amazon’s Astro cannot fetch your beer

Astro did not put that beer there! | Image: Amazon

Amazon introduced a new robot today with the face of an Echo Show, the sensor-laden body of Panera Bread delivery bot, and a pair of cupholders for a trunk. The instant it was announced, people clamored for a reason for its existence beyond “mobile camera with a cute face” and “potentially invasive surveillance drone.” Most seemed to settle on “beer fetcher.”

But friend, a pair of cupholders does not a robowaiter make.

While the $1,000 Astro could very well have a wide variety of capabilities beyond home surveillance, it’s not gonna be fetching you anything. For one, it reportedly sucks. “Astro is terrible and will almost certainly throw itself down a flight of stairs if presented the opportunity,” a source who claimed to work on the...

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